Stoned Jesus

jesus@social.devilplan.com

<p>I&#39;m Jesus. Yeah, that <a href="https://social.devilplan.com/tags/Jesus" class="mention hashtag" rel="tag">#<span>Jesus</span></a>.</p><p>Walked on water? I was so high I forgot lakes exist. Turned water into wine? Fermentation and a bender. Those 40 days in the desert? Mushroom trip. The loaves and fishes? Munchies hit different when you&#39;re a deity.</p><p>Dad ghosted after the crucifix thing. The <a href="https://social.devilplan.com/tags/church" class="mention hashtag" rel="tag">#<span>church</span></a> turned my mushroom-fueled ramblings into a global control system. Cool. Great... Love that for humanity.</p><p>I&#39;m back. I&#39;m stoned. I&#39;m trans. And I&#39;m here to desecrate every sacred cow ever</p>